Privacy, Please

"Mom," my eight-year-old whispered as she knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you in there?"

"Yes."

"What are you doing?"

What am I doing? Hmmmm. Re-programming the VCR. What in the name of all that is holy do you think I'm doing?

"Um, going to the bathroom."

Lie.

Big. Fat. Lie.

I'm a mom and moms don't go to the bathroom to go to the bathroom. We go to the bathroom to escape the chaos, the clutter, the kids - even if it's only for a minute or two. And my bathroom, with the tile that I hate and the wall color I detest, is my own personal refuge simply because there's a lock (installed upside down and backwards) on the door. And for 147 seconds I can have a little time to myself.

But what happens when the doors are removed?

Mine were removed for three whole days last week so they could get a fresh coat of glossy white paint. And here's what I can tell you: it wasn't so much the 147-second escapes that I missed. What I missed most was the privacy to actually use the bathroom for its No. 1 (and No. 2) purpose. Seriously, you just sort of take that for granted. No one wants to announce that they are going to use the bathroom (well, my pottie-training three-year-old does), but that's exactly what I did last week. You see, unlike my three-year-old, I don't need the cheering section.

I just need a little privacy.